Tuesday, March 18, 2008
today's an emo day =(
today's an emo day...duno why.maybe it's because we started talking about such stuff...been wondering whether i had made the right decision to enter this course for a long time..firstly, compared to NUS, we always seems to pale in comparison. next, the things we do are like v diversified..such that i worry without a specialisation like the rest of the engins...how are we ever going to survive? and also, the market for our industry is already sooo saturated that i really duno whether i'll eventually get a job next time..and i really need it...arghh..i am doubting my choice...hais.
perhaps it's because of the stress that's coming from the exams or i've been feeling very empty all these while...used to be active in cca and such..at least there's something meaningful besides pure studying...but now, tuition has already taken up all my wkends..and wkdays is jus travelling to sch and all..even if i want to..i dun think i can juggle..and tt's y i kinda feel useless..there're soo many others out there who can do so well and all..hais..
or perhaps, it's the release of the A levels last week...the teacher at the tuition centre was saying how her niece and nephews all have perfect scores..ppl in RJ etc.and how they're going to apply for medicine.law and such...hais..reminded me of my lousy scores and the state i'm in because of them.i'm really regretful..i shld have put in more effort i guess..i duno..or mayb i'm jus plain stupid.so ya lor.carn expect urself to mark up with the rest..i guess there's always a difference why pple are known as elites....reminds me of the full metal alchemist..hard work doesn't always pay off cos there's no equivalent trade in this world.so ya...emo day today...but wat can i do..i sometimes wonder..
1st wk of apr spells doom...4 tests in a week: material science, maths, biz finance and physics...2 in one day summore.plus formal lab and normal lab to hand in...then the wk after tt is anat and physio! i hope i can seriously survive that wk.
when the hols come, think i shld really reflect on my life...this sumwat empty life...
Xiu Min @ 9:26 PM
